One of the things…
…that came to me when I was brainstorming the initial path I was going to follow with Love.Life.365 theme was a question.
You may be asking yourself… how did all this happen anyway?
How did my wife and I end up on such different tracks?
We used to be in sync, now, not so much.
The short answer? People change. Some are very adaptable to change. Others resist change up to the point it starts to hurt and even beyond.
Has anyone ever told you change is good? I mean, for a couple years that’s all we heard about in the political arena of thought. Then, a while later we found out that change for the sake of change is empty and meaningless. The same goes for the resistance to change. In an accident, some parts of your car are built to be resistant to change of shape resulting from a crash. Other parts are designed to be change “magnets” and absorb the energy from the crash and dissipate by crushing.
So change can be good or bad based on the circumstances.
Years ago, when you married your wife, she was–in most cases–young, somewhat inexperienced in life, and constantly learning. You were the same. Over time, experiences and choices began to shape each of you into the people you are today. In cases where the husband and wife are in sync, they have consistently made the effort to be on top of those changes, while those who are out of sync have not been as vigilant.
So what does this all mean to me?
You need to relearn your wife. Period. You need to make a catch-up effort. Now is not the time for you to expect her to relearn you. Instead, it’s time to take responsibility for your part and focus on being “that guy.” If that seems daunting, then call someone–your pastor, a friend, your brother–someone who is willing to cheer you on and motivate you. You might even want to call your brother-in-law or father-in-law! I mean, who better to help you do this than the brother/father of your wife whose motivation is similar with yours – to help you back in sync with the girl you love!
I am here to help as well – brandedbytheone at gmail.com.
So today starts the process of relearning your wife.
Although I am synched up with my wife, I too, will be working through the steps with you.
Why? Because this is a lifetime process. What you start today will be something you will do every day of the rest of your life.
Think of things you don’t know or can’t remember about your wife.
Write them down. We will be using them in the coming days.
So, for now, see you tomorrow and don’t forget to call her today “just to say I love you.”
-Alan