Reason: Birthday Party
Theme: Star Wars
Attendees, Guests, Party Animals, Perps: 8 Year-old boys
630pm: Party begins – Trusting parents leave their angels in the care of parents of birthday angel
7pm: All participants wet and muddy from swimming and battling it out between the Clones, Rebel Alliance, and the dastardly Sith (with the cool red light sabers)
8pm: Cake – “Mrs. M, I just wanted you to know that last year’s cake was MUCH better…”
actually, it was – it even had a two-foot tall pirate ship on it with gummy sharks in the roiling water…
obviously an attempt to compliment the cake mistress gone awry…
855pm Firepit has burned down to a perfect S’mores roasting environment
9pm 20+ s’mores made – tummies happy
910pm Roasting rods taken away from those ingeniously discovering how to make marshmallow “asphalt” on my deck surface
well, I did need to pressure wash it anyway…
915pm – various other battle scenarios ensue – some in the pool, some in the fort – correction… “Rebel Base” – and one major battle pivoting around the strategic significance of the tire swing – oops, correction…”Death Star Shield Generator”…
11pm Commence theatrical viewing of Star Wars: Episode I
1130pm Parental mistake #1
Ok, boys. As long as you behave responsibly, you can stay up as late as you want.
AS LATE AS WE WANT???? – (think 4 voices in unison)
1145pm Parent leaves picturesque and tranquil scene in son’s bedroom where “tired” boys are curled up in blankets and sleeping bags watching the end of the movie. Won’t be long now…
Midnight. Parents. Dead to world.
130am (LOUD NOISE) something that sounds like crying… Dad gets up.
We started a pillow fight and then ‘ *Billy’ got a bloody nose!
Well, who hit him?
shrugs all around. No squealers here………
*name changed to protect…. – for the record, I never saw any blood.
156am Dad attempts to calm the horde.
Why don’t you guys go to sleep now?
We’re not tired!
Fine, eat something and then go to sleep…
Parent heads back to his cave as a feeding frenzy starts centered around the refrigerator.
230am Sliding door opens. Loud whispers of “don’t forget your light saber” as they tromp out into the back yard for one more battle.
Dog escapes the yard – visits friends?
336am Mommmmmmmmmmmmmm! The toilet keeps flushing!!!!!
Mom gets up.
Discovers water 1/4 inch deep in bathroom and rising.
Shuts off water at wall.
Uses every towel in the cabinet to sop up water.
Hollers for Dad.
Dad performs plunger duties on toilet.
NOT your ordinary clog.
The Force must be Strong in the individual responsible for this one…
Violent, last-ditch “Jedi” plunging technique loosens plug and toilet flushes properly.
4am “As Late As You Want” clause revoked.
….But we’re hungry!
Everyone eats a strawberry bagel.
420am 1st load of sopping wet towels hits the washer.
430am All boys sitting on couch, watching and directing birthday boy how to play LEGO Star Wars on his Nintendo DS.
432am We’re bored!
Just relax and settle down.
They agree to be quiet – just as long as they don’t have to go to sleep.
444am Parents note that it is as quiet as it has ever been for the past 10 hours.
445am . . . . .
PS… baby sister slept through ALL of this.